Managing Your Moods

I had a hard conversation this week with a client who had been dropped by his third recent dating partner. All three women had given him similar feedback: you are too moody. Moodiness refers to the tendency to experience frequent and unpredictable shifts between positive and negative emotions, often without an apparent reason. Let’s face it, moody people are hard to be around. 

It’s normal to experience small fluctuations in how you feel each day. Some mornings we wake up feeling better than others, often for no discernable reason. Mood is an internal experience and actually doesn’t affect anyone else. However, what we don’t always realize is how our mood impacts our behavior. If you are scowling, huffy, short, rude, rolling your eyes, crossing your arms, or even being uncharacteristically silent, these behaviors significantly impact the people around you. 

It’s important to be self-aware and notice when you’re feeling less-than-stellar. On those days, put a concrete self-care plan into place. Practicing self-compassion will not only make you feel better, it will likely limit the impact your bad mood has on those around you. Here are some ideas for mitigating moodiness:

• Identify your triggers and avoid or learn to manage them

• Make a genuine connection with another person and talk to them about how you’re feeling.

• Engage in physical activity, outdoors when possible.

• Limit intake of alcohol, caffeine, and nicotine, all of which can impact mood fluctuations.

• Practice mindfulness, such as yoga or meditation.

If mood fluctuations are having a significant impact on your life or your relationships, contact a mental health professional to get support.